Week 3 and things haven’t changed at all. In fact, we all have these gut feelings that they’ve actually gotten worse. This morning, I saw my son pull into the driveway from his night shift at the ER. I grabbed the dog and waited by the window to wave at him before he entered the house. Except he didn’t. He stayed outside in his car for 30 minutes. I couldn’t see what he was doing, but I was worried. What if he fell asleep from exhaustion – should I call him to wake him up? Or maybe he’s ...
THINKING OUT LOUD
Waiting for the Light
There has always been a perception that for people like me, with happy families and great jobs and careers and who don’t post problems on social media, life is perfect and everything is hunky dory. Today, more than ever, I felt the need to write this post. Just an hour ago, my husband, my son and I stood in our living room and listened to Sunday mass on TV, streaming directly from our parish. Outside our window, snow flakes fell slowly and steadily, blanketing everything in its path – the ...
How to Live in this World (A.K.A. My New Year 2020 Post)
HAPPY 2020! I thought I should get all caught up while on vacation, fully aware that I’m a few days late with my New Year post. Hope you are all settling into the New Year with much anticipation and excitement for what’s to come. As for me, I am still living in my over-analyzing (horoscopes) and dreading (more changes) stage but hoping it dissipates as the weeks progress. 2019 was so kind to me in a way that was different from recent years. It presented me with numerous opportunities, all of ...
Thank You for My Smaller Life
Another year, another turkey. Seems like we were just here, cleaning, cooking, preparing our home for our families and loved ones. But not really. We’re in a new home that’s half the size of our old home, in a new neighborhood, in a different state. Everything is so new to us - I’m anxious every time I leave my house, Google Maps is turned on for trips to the nearest grocery store. Or dry cleaner. Or nail salon. This unfamiliarity has been so tough, I’m relieved every time I sit at O’Hare ...
The (Two) Year(s) I Left
The Year I Left. Actually, it was two years. And although it feels like a lifetime ago, everything still sits so vividly in memory. Caught up in a swirl of activity and events, I could hardly recognize myself. I didn’t know it was depression at that time, all I knew was that I was ready to leave this life. I wanted to do the opposite of everything I’d ever stood for. When I decided to write The Year I Left, it was for personal reasons, just like all my other books. Writing my thoughts and ...
These Are the Days
What a whirlwind it’s been. I was actually doing a college drop off on Release Day, so in between texts and posts, I was on an emotional level all on its own. He’s our youngest, you know. And his personality has been the highlight of our home for 18 years. The irony of both events isn’t lost on me, however. We are empty nesters and we have to adjust to life with a lot more time on our hands. Although I say this tongue in cheek because I’ve planned travel every week for work for the rest of the ...